Thank You

The theme today will be Friendship again.

Why? Because it is just that important, life changing and character forming as those other experiences in life :)!

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Around 11 years ago, I met two very precious people to me. Thinking back, right before meeting these two girls, I was readying myself to be on my own, after having bravely broken away from a group of friends where things were not going well.  In the mind of a 12 year old, that’s a scary place to be!

I had already met one of them on the second day of high school. I lived an hour away from home, with no knowledge of how to take the bus to get home, let alone get to the bus station, and I was stranded as nobody was there to pick me up. I was there on the steps of the building when, remembering that this girl lived in roughly the same area as me (give or take a 30 minute bus journey :P) , I decided to ask her if I could get a lift from her as her father worked in the school opposite ours. She thankfully said yes and I got dropped off fairly close to home and got home around 3 hours later than I was supposed to, in tears no less!

Our first reunion when we were crazy 17 year olds

Little would I know that this slightly aloof girl would become such a pillar of support and an amazing best friend! When I first joined the group with her and Anjalee, it is safe to say we were not bosom buddies but rather she was slightly wary of me! But life works in mysterious ways and today I can honestly say that life would not be the same without her advice, support, love and constant loyalty! We just go crazy when we are all together, and even freer to be ourselves without a care for the world or what anybody else thinks!

Still just as zany at 20

Still just as zany at 20!

Despite a distance of miles, our friendship is just as it was, if not stronger, whenever we have met again over the years. I have also seen her grow into a stronger, self assured and more beautiful person.  She is currently pursuing her dream of becoming a doctor. It is not an easy path but she is going through all the ups and downs with admirable courage and strength of spirit!  Today we are all three growing up so quickly but when we are all three together, it is like no time has elapsed and we are still mischievous 13 year olds :) ! The bond between us is still strong and it is true that we are all three soul mates! ^_^ I also know that we will always be there for each other, no matter what and that is an amazing thing in itself because it is so rare to find best friends like these two :) .

Happy Birthday Bestie, you with your crazy quirks, extremely talented dancing, compassion, support, comfort and courage! Love you loads! :) Most of all, Thank you for being you and I am always grateful for knowing that I have you out there in the Universe!

This post is dedicated to  Sheekha; best friend of 11 years :)  and is also her birthday present! ^_^

2011 and still going strong :)

Fate and Friendship

Nearly two years ago, I was embarking on a fresh start in life. After harsh failure, depression and a very difficult two years…
But the difference was myself; I was a changed person, a better and stronger one. Armed with a new, positive, “I am all right” and the “Universe conspires to act for my own good” attitude and wise advice from my best friends in Mauritius, I went to university on a sunny autumn day in September. Despite all of this, one cannot help but be scared and anxious, and I trudged along on my first day, with it ending by having made one friend from the library tour.
The second day dawned, and I told myself this countless times, “It is ok to be on my own. If I don’t make friends now, it is not the end of the world. It takes time.”

Then the Universe stepped in.

I do believe it is true, when you surrender to the fact that there is a master plan out there and that the contribution we make is decision making, that Life, Fate, the Universe or God, conspires to show us the way. On that second day I met by chance, a group of wonderful people, by stepping up and talking to someone during a lunch gathering. From then this group of people I met just naturally gravitated towards each other and today we are still a tight knit group. For that I am always grateful, because friendship like that is very rare.

Amongst all these people, was an oldie like myself (even though only a year younger ;P). She had the same fears as mine; “I am older than these children, what do I do if I have to be alone?” Within the space of probably 6 months, through an argument, shared train journeys and probably experiences that were more than what we thought we had in common, we became good friends. At present, I can call her my best friend, because truly and honestly, on a level that I have only ever connected with my two other best friends before, I connect with her. As we both say, we are soul mate sisters ^_^!

Through common experiences, shared understanding of them, our love of food, music( not always the same ;) ) and shared values, I found another treasure of a friend who is an amazing person!


Why am I sharing this today? Simply because it is her birthday! ^_^ I am unwell and was not able to meet her to give her her presents, and wish her a very Happy Birthday!
So this post is dedicated to her! And also to my two other very precious best friends, and soul sisters of 11 years (Theirs is a story that will take a longer post ;) )!

Thank You Pie! For being the great person and friend you are! No matter what happens, I believe in you and I love you child! Even though I have only known you for two years, it feels like much longer! Be strong always and I know you have the potential to become an even better and bigger person ( spiritually not physically lol) and Happpyy Birthday sister!! ^_^

Ju and Sheek, Thank you my soul sisters! For always having stuck by me, no matter how much the distance! I know I don’t say it often, but I am always very thankful and grateful for always having you two in my life! I will always be there for you (haha Friends!) It doesn’t matter how long I am away, because whenever I am back it always feels like we are back in F3 when I left but with an even stronger bond. Love you both! (P.S: Look what I found ^_^)

Finally, I am very proud of all of you. The growth I have seen and I see in you (and me ) is amazing and you are awesome human beings! <3 To many more years of craziness and wonderful times!

Happy Birthday Pie! Love you sister! ^_^

Always grateful

ImageI was having a conversation with my best friend quite a while ago, telling her about this diary entry of mine that I have to show her. It was an epiphany, I guess? A real moment of clarity and peace. She suggested, why not put this on your blog? And here I am (albeit a few months later !) ! This somewhat follows on from my previous post.

I have always had a roof over my head, no matter where I was in the world.

I have always had the love and warmth of my parents, sometimes it might not have seemed like it to me, but it was there.

I have almost always had my best friends, no matter where, no matter when , be it night or day.

I have always been protected, kept safe from harm.

Had life been made somewhat easier (in most instances) for me.

Had education, no restriction to broaden my horizons, to seek knowledge. Always had the freedom to express myself.

The protection and support of loved ones, while also having the freedom to follow my path, of my own choosing.

Thus the point of all of this is simply that I have an abundance of wealth, not materialistically speaking, but as a human being.

I ask the Universe for forgiveness for all the times I have complained, cried and been angry for the things I did not get, I lost, the condition I have, the “no boyfriend at this age” complaint etc. , because I realise I have everything for a happy life, right now.

Some people ( children, babies  and adults) do not even have a fraction of all this and still continue living their lives.

I will someday for sure help them. I want to give, share what I have so generously always received from life, unconditionally.

And thus ended my simple and humble epiphany. It was probably always there at the back of my mind but never came to me so clearly and simply. Maybe because it was early in the morning and so quiet around me?

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Irony and so on…

On the train today, I saw two advertisements, side by side.

Why is this ironic? Well one of the ads was a Christmas emergency appeal for homeless children by the charity Shelter. The second was an ad for made.com for various items ranging from a chair which cost around 100 pounds,  a glorified bicycle  costing close to 200 pounds and much more.
How ironic life is. There are people who are able to and who do buy these things while there are homeless children who might die on cold streets. No food, no warmth and no shelter.image

Makes one think how do people who sail through life, having all those things but being blissfully ignorant to the plight of others, live with themselves ?

For less than half the price of one of these items, those children could get shelter during these dangerous and difficult times. Does this mean I am condemning those who do want these nice things in life? Simply put… No, I really am not. People work hard and there is nothing wrong with enjoying a few nice things in life.  I read the following in the book, “Discover Your Destiny with The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari: The 7 Stages of Self-Awakening” by Robin Sharma. It says that it is not wrong to want money and live a comfortable life but  to be careful that making money does not become the sole focus of one’s life above all else.  I really love this quote which really summarizes it all ; ” money is the unintended yet inevitable by-product of a life spent helping others get what they want.”  

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As for myself, I am always very grateful and glad that I was born in a middle class family. My parents have worked very hard. They both come from families where their fathers were in menial jobs (labourers in fields and manual jobs) and their mothers were housewives. Their life was difficult but nevertheless a character building childhood, adolescence and adulthood.  I am very proud of both of them to be the open minded and strong individuals they are today. The environment which me and my siblings grew up in, allowed us  to think more about our career paths in terms of what we want to do rather than we HAVE to do any jobs which will allow us to get a lot of money. For this, I am eternally grateful, because not once have I thought to find a job purely for the financial gain. I know money is important and however much I do make, I will save and manage within my means.

Coming back to the initial issue, what is it that those who are in a position to help using the fortunes they have can do? Even whilst enjoying the finer things in life?

I guess this is something to ponder on and carefully consider…

Raindrops

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Autumn is definitely making its presence known

Introspection

Today I felt humbled… This world has amazing people who are an inspiration. We get so caught up in the little things in everyday life that we  sometimes forget the important issues. How insignificant some things can be, like not being able to go to a concert, not being able to afford Tiffany jewellery, not being able to eat everything, not having designer bags, not being able to work up the courage to do things… and so on… Image

I am not saying they are silly but in the bigger scheme of life…they are… Not being able to afford these things while there are people, children, babies in the world who do not have basic things like a roof over their heads, running water or clothes. As for not being able to eat anything, there are people out there who do not eat for days, cannot afford a meal and even cannot feed their babies or children. Courage? Their are little children who have to start supporting their families, walking miles to get water or food, have to survive in the most dangerous environment, do not get education and often do not make it into adulthood despite all their efforts.

How can I complain? Can I not make a conscious effort not to? Can I , knowing all of this, not strive towards becoming a person who will help these people? The answer.. quite obvious, yes! This does not mean that I cannot enjoy the things I do have, but maybe giving up a treat or luxury a month to contribute to these causes, however small, makes a difference. It is a start and is what I can currently do while working towards becoming that person who can help all these people.

The trigger to all these thoughts? Simply put, browsing the CNN website and coming across the CNN heroes 2012. Here are links to the articles that really inspired me, not to say the others are not equally inspiring, but for some reason these stood out;

http://edition.cnn.com/SPECIALS/cnn.heroes/2012.heroes/malya.villard-appolon.html

http://edition.cnn.com/SPECIALS/cnn.heroes/2012.heroes/catalina.escobar.html

http://edition.cnn.com/SPECIALS/cnn.heroes/2012.heroes/pushpa.basnet.html

Relationships…Ah how you puzzle me!

Yesterday my day ended with a very interesting conversation with one of my best friends. The topic?  Hah! One that has been spoken about for aeons ;) , our friend, Love and Relationships!

My friend was reflecting on her outlook on relationships and love, eventually ending with the both of us deciding that we are not ready for either of these. One interesting issue we touched on was the fact that the couples we see around us seem to have this almost (for lack of a better word) forced, superficial image and behaviour. Don’t get me wrong, I know this sounds very prejudiced, but we agreed on this based on having seen those close to us do this not strangers. We might very well be wrong.

What puzzles me is, why do most couples seem to end up conforming to what society expects to see from a couple? For most it most probably occurs unconsciously but why does it happen? We as individuals have our own identities, the unique personality (as our genes :P) that makes us who we are.

When we start a relationship, yes we compromise and make allowances to mesh better with the other person, but some seem to lose their identity while trying to please their partner. Rather than being in a healthy relationship where both parties are interdependent, it ends up being one where both are dependent on each other to the extent that one person gets sick of the other. Taking the example of communication, why is it that one has to phone the other constantly during the day? Once is understandable, but up to 4-5 times is ridiculous! Is there no such thing as building up the excitement, the expectation, that at the end of the day if they both meet, they can relate all and have a good conversation? As I told my friend, I would rather not speak for a day or even a week with my boyfriend and have a good, long, meaningful conversation with him when we do meet!

Another thing that bothers me is, why when couples who are not living together, when they are conversing on the phone ask each other trivial things such as, “Have you eaten yet?” , “Did you sleep well?”… What can they do if the answer is negative? It has no purpose as they can’t change the situation! Is it because they have spoken to each other so often that there isn’t anything else except from trivial things to ask about?

In the media today and in our society itself, this stereotypical image of what couples should be is portrayed. Calling each other at all times of the day and night and living in each others pockets, having to spend inordinate amounts of time together are some of those behavioural “expectations”. I think when couples start off, most of the players starting as teenagers or young adults, they have this image of how they should both be as a couple, that is based on how couples they have thus far seen around them and mostly in popular media behave.

Oops erring to much on the negative side :P ! Coming back to better thoughts ;). To me, a romantic relationship should not define who we are, but rather who both of us are defines the relationship.(Complicated, yes but logical hehehe :) )  With time I have realised that the mind,  rather than looks, is what appeals to me. So a person who has a strong sense of his own identity and does not lose it when entering a relationship is an worthy partner indeed! There are couples out there who are not like this, even around me! I would like to emulate those people, especially my parents :) . I have seen how over the years they have had to accommodate each others different personalities and it took effort and compromise to reach where they are now, but its all worth it right? ^_^

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